How'd it feel making her break her religion?
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
