His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Randomize
