waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize