I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
