I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Randomize
