Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
We are all done wearing pants today
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Randomize
