If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
