I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Randomize
