can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
My mom asked what the mark on my neck was - I told her I burned it with a straightener.
She believed that the monsterous hickey on your neck was a burn?
well, not really. but then i reminded her that my sister has yet to take that pregnancy test and she conviniently forgot about my hickey
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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