her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize