from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
