walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
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She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
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