You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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