This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Randomize
