im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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