If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
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My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
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Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
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