Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
