Texts From Last Night

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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks

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  (781): I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks http://tfl.nu/m8t9
  Replies (8) Good night (1566) Bad night (419)
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself

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  (902): she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself http://tfl.nu/wlq8
  Replies (1) Good night (727) Bad night (2617)
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?

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  (706): Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date? http://tfl.nu/833l
  Replies (60) Good night (491) Bad night (4370)
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  (619): View more from California

  its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.

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  (619): its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite. http://tfl.nu/gcjl
  Replies (7) Good night (3159) Bad night (564)
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  (302): View more from Delaware

  I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.

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  (302): I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long. http://tfl.nu/8u3p
  Replies (59) Good night (3345) Bad night (1213)
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  (914): View more from New York

  is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?

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  (914): is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville? http://tfl.nu/0twm
  Replies (44) Good night (1490) Bad night (5590)
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  (585): View more from New York

  ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried

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  (585): ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried http://tfl.nu/b5zu
  Replies (7) Good night (6631) Bad night (1065)
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  (810): View more from Michigan

  i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors

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  (810): i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors http://tfl.nu/jlfm
  Replies (4) Good night (1883) Bad night (829)
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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?

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  (336): You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right? http://tfl.nu/gdo1
  Replies (6) Good night (3214) Bad night (745)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.

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  (402): Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week. http://tfl.nu/y6xg
  Replies (16) Good night (3794) Bad night (964)
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  (406): View more from Montana

  I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.

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  (406): I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way. http://tfl.nu/wnl7
  Replies (11) Good night (518) Bad night (1232)
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  (619): View more from California

  I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.

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  (619): I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now. http://tfl.nu/s7lw
  Replies (6) Good night (842) Bad night (635)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions

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  (717): I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions http://tfl.nu/aecl
  Replies (5) Good night (558) Bad night (455)
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?

  (1-706): View more from Georgia

  You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.

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  (706): Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one? (1-706): You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome. http://tfl.nu/97og
  Replies (4) Good night (811) Bad night (313)
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  (562): View more from California

  Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.

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  (562): Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me. http://tfl.nu/wmlt
  Replies (8) Good night (229) Bad night (525)

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