I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
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Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
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So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
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