You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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