Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
