return my video game
I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Randomize
