your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
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