I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
Randomize