try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
