I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
i think i have herpe
just one?
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
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