brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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