Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
Randomize
