Pregnant stripper...not hot.
WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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