Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
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