I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Randomize
