Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Randomize
