So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize