Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
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