i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
