We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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