worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
