so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
