i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize