Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Randomize
