I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
i just wanna soil my oats bro
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
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