I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
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