he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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