My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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