i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize
