I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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