the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
