Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
It was confusing and full of hummus
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize
