Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
Pants 0. Shit 1.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
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