let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize
