Dude, I just rear-ended a cab
Are you drunk?
A little...yes
Run!
Terrible brother advice.
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Randomize
